Friday, February 17, 2006

Friday, Feb. 17: Early Morning. Awake?

Here it is early morning, and I’m so called awake. But awake to what? When I ask that question I begin to sense my breathing and fingers as I type away at this silly machine. What would our lives be without a computer? Sweet, if we were off in the country, waking to the dawn, getting up to do tai chi, or to go milk the goats, or stroll through the woods. Here in this mini-city, and having taken an aim of writing into the blogosphere once a day, I guess a computer is a necessary evil.

And when I get into speculations, mental masturbation of a sort, I lose connection with my fingers and my feet on the floor and my breathing. And when I write about them, I have the story: this isn’t very interesting to write about.

And it probably isn’t that interesting to read about. (More speculation; my business is being interested in what I’m interested in. Your business is being interested in what you are interested in. If I’m happy to be alive and to be interested just now, I’m pulling my weight, at least in a room alone.)

But to do this now thing, with fingers, breathing, hands, spine, toes, what light is coming in my eyes. That feels good. That feels awake. So what if it’s five thirty in the morning? Life as sensed in the moment is always sweet, even looking at a silly computer screen as one letter at a time pops up into view.

One moment at a time, and how much can I fill my life with awareness? That’s a nice question for me. How about you?


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