the end of suffering

DAY TWENTY-THREE: THE END OF SUFFERING
The beginning of wisdom

In the fourth question of the Byron Katie work, we are asked to ask ourselves what life would be like, what we would be like, if we didn’t believe the big bad story. Or, we didn’t attach to the thought. Or, we didn’t hold onto our opinion. Or, we just looked at Reality without the requirements that our judgment/ story/ thought/ belief/ concept puts on it.

And this looking at the world without the story is not a requirement, as in, “Just let go,” or “Just drop it,” or “Just move on.” (That amazing little “just” again.)

No, this question is to give our minds something to do besides grind over and over with our conviction of being right.

Recall question #3: How do you react when you attach to the thought?

And add on question #4: Who or what are you when you don’t attach to the thought?

You and I and any of us always have this choice: to look at the world thought the lens of “should” and “shouldn’t”, which is pretty much what every judgment boils down to.

Or to look at the world as It Is.


So, for today and tomorrow, play with this. Feel the troubled statements and thoughts and feelings and opinions come up in you and do the contrast game: Who am I, and how do I feel, live and react when I believe the thought/ idea/ concept/ story/ belief/ opinion.

And who am I and how to I feel, live and react if the outer world were just the same (“just!”), and we had no demand that it be different with our thinking/ believing/ demanding/ opinioning/ story making.

The trick then is to find the thought, the should or shouldn’t behind any feeling of unhappiness, stress or unease.

And then to write down the sentence. Make it short. “So and so should like me more.” “X should be more interested in me.” “Y should treat other people better.” And so on. Then, if you want to do the first two questions first, the Is it true question and the Can I absolutely believe it’s true question, fine.

Otherwise hang out with the comparing game: this is my mind and life and state of being when I believe the statement.

And this is me and my mind and heart and life without believing the thought.

Have fun.

Don’t be good. You don’t have to drop the belief. Just keep noticing the difference, and as Katie says, the belief just might drop you.
(“Just”!)