Day Twenty-Nine: What to Leave Behind: Part of "me" or all of "me"

Any change means a small or large death. Any deep change can almost feel like a death to the “me” personality behind which we hide, sometimes from others, sometimes from life, always from our really self.

Inside us is a beautiful and real part. Call it your Self, call it the innocent one, call it our awareness, call it God, or the Child of God. It is without a name.

Names are what we call each other, in both senses of that phrase. But who we all are is deeper and quieter than all that.

And sometimes the world gets too heavy with us, and we suffer and to leave that suffering behind seems like the hardest thing in the world.

Strange, because it would seem that suffering is what we would most prefer to give up. Sure, if we could give it up and stay just the same. If we could give it up, and not, as Jesus asked the rich man, “give up our possessions.” In this case, the possessions are our fixed ideas and almost always the bitter and killing us conviction that we are Right.

We are Right, and until the world shapes up, we are going to keep being Right, and even if that causes immense suffering, we’d rather be right than happy. Often. Not always.

And when we let go of that “right-ness” that “so and so done me wrong” it is like a little death.

And on the other side of that death: resurrection into love.

First we are angry/ hurt/ resentful/ bitter because “so and so did us wrong.” Maybe we do the work of Byron Katie, and see, notice, feel, understand the difference at question #3: Who are we and how do we feel and live and react when we attach to the thought that “so and so done me wrong”

That questions makes life one way. Questions #4: Who would we be without the story that “so and so done me wrong”? creates a whole new person.

Or rather liberates that real shining clear happy and loving self that is our Self.

But on the way, it can feel like a death to let go of the attachment to our belief. Death, death, death, scary, scary, scary and then we do it, and the old crusty worthless judge dies away, and we are reborn.

So today, die before you die, as many times as you can and be reborn each time closer and closer to who you really are.

Good.

Troubled?. Love Poem to God, by Hafiz

Troubled?
Then stay with me, for I am not.

Lonely?
A thousand naked amorous ones dwell in
ancient caves
beneath my Eye.

Riches?
Here’s the pick:
My whole body is an
Emerald that begs:
“Take me.”

Write all that bothers you
On a parchment.
Offer it to God.

Even from this distance of a
Millennium, I can reach out the

Flame from my heart
into your life

And turn
all that frightens
You
into
Holy Ash

Hafiz,
Rendered by Daniel Ladinsky
in
Love Poems to God

DAY NINETEEN Arms, and legs AND spine

DAY NINETEEN
Arms, and legs AND spine

If a child draws a person, they draw five lines with a head on top. Two legs coming together in a cone shape, then the spine going up with the head on top and two arms sticking out. Sometimes a dress is drawn on this, far easier to draw than pants and shirt.

Let’s add the spine to sensing our arms and legs.

This is a good step, a sweet step to having an ongoing sense of our skeleton as we go about our day.


This is a fantastic way to be present.

Also fantastic to be aware of when we your slopping ourselves around in our sitting and standing and moving and not taking advantage of the miracle of having our skeleton and awareness as a sweet unity.


And as always, when is a grand time to “do” these sense our legs meditations? These sense our arms and legs meditations? And now this one, this sense our arms and legs and spine meditation?

Now?

Yes, now. As we read this page on this book, our legs are in some position in the world and so are our arms. Somewhere in between them, connecting to the pelvis, is our spine. Somewhere holding our arms via our ribs and shoulder blades: our spine.

For fun, lets round our spine a little, right now, no matter where we are. And then arch it. And breathe easily and freely with delight and ease.

Good.

And then some rotating, head to the left, ribs to the left, pelvis to the left and back to the middle a few times. With ease and delight. Then some rotating to the right. That’s right.

All day, best we can, spine, arms and legs. And breathe.