72: What to do?

What to do? Wake up while talking.

Yesterday we were playing with being more awake to ourselves while we are moving our tongues around and talking to other people. But, there is another side to this sweet story.

Yes. The other person.

To person to whom we were talking, also know as, the person we were talking to.

Good.

Waking up in talking is hard, silly, amazing, fun, and one of the last stages of really being awake.

Sitting in your room or cave and being calm and clear, that’s nice, and then we go out and get involved in the world.

We talk.

Presumably to other people.

They listen, or pretend to listen, or do a bad or good job of listening, but they are there.

Can we hear our words and sense the vibration (not spiritually “energy” vibration, but the actual vibration in our throats and chests and head) of our speaking, AND look at and see the other person as they listen.

Watching their interest or disinterest. Watching their eyes. Watching their breathing. Watching their happiness or unhappiness.

Watching them struggling to pretend to listen while actually just rehearsing inside the words they are going to say next. (Just the way we do, so often, so often, so often.)

It’s all good, and it’s a big job and it’s an amazing one, paying attention in the moment inward to real here and now sensations as we talk, and outward to the physical sight and sound of the other person.

This is a game. This is a life: waking up to other people as we are in conversation with them.

Day Twenty-five, What if we didn't "Have to..."

DAY TWENTY-FIVE
What if we didn’t “have to”?

We sometimes go through our days, one event / job/ tasks to the next, all propelled forward by what we “have to” do next. It sometimes seems that half the time at least, we are lost from the present in what we are doing because as we near the end of one “have to” activity, we focus inside on “getting to” and then “how are we going to do it” about the next “have to” activity.

This is pretty easily seen for the missing out on the present it is, but in today’s aim, I’d like us to focus also on the burden of the “have to” that is lurking in our feelings all day.

What would we be like if we “just” did thing, or didn’t do things, without the nagging, or reminding, or persistent voice of this is what we “have to” do.

This writing now. I’m setting out to do so much today. I could be doing it to get rid of the “have to” voice that was coming up earlier. Then I realized that I could just write and let that voice be silent. Maybe I “had to” do this writing to fulfill a goal I’d set for myself. Maybe I didn’t.

All that seemed like a waste of energy as I was getting in a car to drive in the rain. I could leave the voice behind and just get into the car, sense myself on the seat, follow my breathing.

And now I’m writing.

Feels such and such in my arms and legs and spine.

Maybe I have to do it, maybe I don’t. The Universe will get along just fine if I don’t, and I’m enjoying do it, and what can you feel in yourself right now.

And what if, after you’ve read this chapter and imagined a day without the “have to “ voice inside, you took a little “rest” after reading this chapter. A little pause where you “did nothing” and didn’t think about what you “have to” do next, or “have to” do today. You just sat, or stood, or walked, or lay down, or lay down and moved around. Then you got up and discovered yourself doing what you did next. Have that day.

Day Two: Sensing Breathing, Too

DAY TWO

This very breath, the one you are taking right now. Can you feel and enjoy it in all it’s entirety? This breath comes, goes, and then the next.

Usually we aren’t aware of our breathing.

Today that will be our focus: to be aware of our breathing, while we sense our two legs and go about our day.

And it was hard enough yesterday, right, to keep attention on remembering to keep attention on our legs and feet and knees and skin and bones and all the way to the hip joints.

And now breathing.

We are alive.

Air and gravity. This is the stuff of life.
This is enough to bring us to awaking.

And hey, it’s hard, isn’t it?

Maybe better to give up ideas of awakening, just keep drifting, just keep doing the best we can. And yes, keep doing the best we can, and underneath that to give ourselves the present of the present, the gift of now.

This is it.

This is the moment, and if we are following our breathing, we can know we are really there.

If we are sensing our legs, we can know we are really here, right where we happened to be, right now.


Where are you?
What does sensing your breathing and your legs tell you about being where you are right now?

This is something that we can do while walking, while showering, while making breakfast, while making love (it will make us a much better lover), while working, while playing, while praying. We can be present in breath and legs. Yes.