Ten: Emotions as actions

Emotions, viewed as actions, are something we can vary, and in this variation become free of long time stuck reactions and misery.

Say someone, some X ( either an ex-partner, friend, or just some other person we’ll call X), does something Y. And we react in a usual way, Z.

X does Y and out of our emotional machine box comes Z.

So and so gives us a mean little comment and we feel ‘hurt,” say.

Okay, we might take that as a given.

Later, we’ll look deeply into the work of Byron Katie as a way out of slavery to our habitual reactions.

And for today, since we just looked at “acture” as the use of ourselves in actions, let’s look at emotions as if they were an action.

Say we go to “hurt.” Okay, that’s our default. Now, just to begin to broad the scope of how we react, can we stand up and feel our “hurt?”

What if we stand and see what happens if we put the weight on our right foot as we feel our “hurt.” The left foot.

If we think of the person.

If we look at what’s really here, now.

If we follow our breathing while we feel “hurt?”

If we sense our five lines while we feel “hurt?”


And now for the deeper variations:

What if we think, hmmm, I’m making this action of “hurt” and if so, how long would I like to feel it? One minute? Four minutes? Ten minutes?

And since I’m doing it, do I want a little bit of hurt, a medium amount, a big chunk.

And then blending these two: big hurt for 10 seconds. Little hurt for two days.

Just to think it’s something we get to chose starts to do wonders.


And now even deeper.

If “hurt” is one action, what if we try other Z’s to the equation, X does Y and we react (which means act, but they start it rolling) with Z.

What if they do Y, and we get curious?

Angry?

Afraid?

Happy?

Compassionate?

Amused?

Loving?

Bored?

Happy?


Some of these actions are obviously farther from our available repertoire than others. So be it. The trying and the experimenting and going slow and gentle with ourselves is the game.

For today.

For life.

This could be a whole book, a whole life. Let’s see how today goes as a start.